The Note “Una caro” arises from a question: what makes marriage a unique bond? The Dicastery for the Doctrine of the Faith responds with a text that places monogamy within the current debate, avoiding polarisation and proposing a reflection capable of interpreting social transformations. Presenting the document, Cardinal Víctor Manuel Fernández states that the intention is to offer “reasons and motivations that encourage the choice of a unique and exclusive union of charity”, capable of generating “a rich and all-embracing mutual belonging”. The document situates the discussion within a context marked by technological development, in which the human person risks perceiving himself “as a creature without limits”, losing the dimension of a bond that grows through shared responsibility. Hence the decision to deepen the theme of unity, a property of marriage which, according to the Dicastery, has been explored “less extensively than the theme of indissolubility” even though it is decisive for understanding its structure.
The Note “Una caro. An Eulogy of Monogamy” is organised into an introduction, three thematic sections, and a conclusion. The main themes concern the motivations behind the document, new forms of union, the property of conjugal unity, and education for fidelity. The text gathers doctrinal contributions and cultural references to outline the current context of relationships and monogamy.
New Forms of Love and the Need for a Stable Choice
The most extensive part of the document concerns the transformations affecting affective relationships. The Dicastery recalls the motivations that led to its drafting: “various dialogues with the Bishops of Africa and other continents on the question of polygamy” and “the observation that various public forms of non-monogamous union – sometimes called ‘polyamory’ – are growing in the West”. The Note specifies that monogamy “is not simply the opposite of polygamy” but “much more”, because it concerns the quality of the bond and the capacity to build a belonging that cannot be substituted. The text lists “various drifts regarding charity: an increase in divorces, the fragility of unions, the trivialisation of adultery, the promotion of polyamory”, indicating an increasing difficulty in maintaining lasting relationships.
The paradox, observes the Dicastery, is that while practices tend towards fragmentation, “the great collective narratives continue to extol the myth of great, unique and exclusive love”.
In this context, the Note presents monogamy as a positive choice, “intimately linked to the unitive end of sexuality”, capable of strengthening exclusive union and the sense of mutual belonging. Unity is described as an “essential and primary property”, a “communion of life” that enables marriage to be recognised “in all its richness and fruitfulness”. The document then recalls biblical and traditional foundations, presenting them as an interpretative reference for humanity’s search for stability.
A Choice Involving Education and Responsibility
The final part of the Note focuses on the educational dimension. The Dicastery observes that “the desire for monogamous charity remains inscribed in the depths of the human person, even when behaviours seem to contradict it”, but that such desire requires appropriate formative pathways. The text invites us to understand marriage as a process requiring progressive learning, in which autonomy and reciprocity support each other over time.
Monogamy is presented as a relational form capable of generating trust and continuity in a context marked by brief and reversible bonds.
For this reason, the Dicastery emphasises that the response to contemporary fragilities “is to be found in education”, which is called to safeguard the capacity for fidelity and to support the affective maturation of the younger generations. The conclusion of the document opens to the possibility that exclusive union may become a shared reference point, not through imposition but through conviction, restoring to the conjugal “we” its social and symbolic strength.
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